Hiding it
by maraki-maraki
Summary: Albus falls in love with his best friend Scorpius and he is trying to get over it so their frienship won't be ruined. Angsty, fluffy, romantic! Scorbus!


**I don't own Harry Potter.**

...

It hadn't been much time even since he found out. A week, tops. He realized it when they were apart, and he confirmed it when they were together. Chances were it was going on for quite a long time, but it was one of Rose's snarky comments that made the thought strike him.

He was talking about him.

In fact, he was talking about the day the other boy forced him to watch a Quidditch practice together, to be exact. About the excitement that was lightening up his marvelous grey eyes as he watched the players take off, play, perform maneuvers that made him think he'd break his neck just by watching them. About how the other one screamed and wrapped himself around him the moment the Seeker, chasing after the Snitch, flew over them and avoided crashing on them by an inch. About how, when it started raining, they run together inside the castle, both soaking wet and laughing, with his blonde hair glued to his forehead.

"Oh, stop it!" his cousin interrupted. "You've been talking about him _all afternoon_. We were supposed to be playing Explosive Chess!"

That was the first time he got the idea, even though it he needed a second one to accept it.

It was the same night, in the Slytherin common room. When his friend walked in, sat right next to him on the green couch without much thought and glued his body right against his own, as if it was normal for them to be so close – and maybe it should have been.

He wasn't certain what it was that made him realize. Whether it was that tingling, whether it was his heart that couldn't stop beating, or whether it was the fact that he couldn't stop smiling, he now knew one thing.

He, Albus Severus Potter was in love with his best friend, Scorpius Hyperion Malfoy.

At first he got scared. Like, _really_ scared.

As soon as he realized that he was staring at him like a fool for two full minutes, and that this was something difficult to go unnoticed, his face turned deep red and he left the common room as fast as he could, no explanation whatsoever. Scorpius ran after him, shouting out his name, just like any proper friend would have done. But since exercise was a word unknown to Scorpius, he wasn't able to keep up long enough.

Albus, on the other hand, reached the Moaning Myrtle's bathroom without even thinking about it. His lungs were on fire and he was certain he was going to be sick. The floor didn't seem disgusting as he collapsed on it, proof of his distress.

Still, even this seemed better than having to spend one more minute with Scorpius.

Quite a long time passed, with Myrtle always hovering over his head. At some point he started crying but he knew neither when nor why.

All he could think about was that Scorpius was his best friend, nothing more. But a single wrong move was enough to turn him into much less.

And he would give his life to keep that from happening.

When he got out of the bathroom, he had no idea how much time had gone by. He had never felt more grateful that it was past curfew and the hallways were empty, because he was dying to go straight to his dorm and sleep.

His next moves were planned exactly in his head.

He fell asleep quickly, listening to the quiet snores of the other boys. He had no idea than one of his roommates had stayed wide awake while waiting for him to return, nor that at that moment he was being closely observed him by a pair of shiny grey eyes.

….

The next day, as it was expected, Scorpius demanded an explanation for last night's behavior.

Albus was prepared. For that and for everything.

He told him that he had just remembered the assignment for professor Longbottom was due today. Yes, it _was_ that urgent because he hadn't even started it by then, and of course he would have stopped when Scorpius called him, if, simply, he had heard him.

"Even if I had heard you, the library would close after an hour, so I was in a _real_ hurry", the brown-haired boy explained himself.

His friend shot him a strange look and swallowed the urge to ask him why he hadn't returned after half an hour.

Scorpius wasn't stupid. He could see clear as day that something was wrong with his friend, but pushing his was out of the question. Albus was his best friend, and the young Malfoy had no doubt that he would tell him right away if he had a problem. And since he wasn't telling him, it was obviously either something unimportant, or something he wasn't ready to talk about yet.

On the other side, Albus had set up an entire plan. In his head, all he had to do was to set priorities. The scolding and the lectures to himself had failed, but then he understood what was the most important.

He couldn't lose Scorpius.

After that, he knew exactly what he was going to do.

Thus, over the course of one week, Albus kept his distance. He turned even more to himself, if something like that was possible. Scorpius kept trying to approach him but soon he realized that the more he was trying, the more his friend would avoid him. Soon, the young Potter achieved his goal: Scorpius gave up and decided to just leave him alone.

Albus knew that it wouldn't stay like that for long, so he had to hurry up.

He had to get over the other boy.

Having used to do practically everything with Scorpius, this week was pretty tough for him. Worse, he just couldn't find a way to get him out of his head!

He was everywhere! From the seat next to him in almost every class to the Great Hall to their common room to their dorm! Studying was much harder than usual now, that his brain refused to cooperate, and he turned to Rose to sneak him some food so he wouldn't have to show up at meals. The girl gave him hell to tell her why but thanks to his stubbornness, she decided that it was an extra quirk of his she had to add to the list.

Still.

No matter what he did, Scorpius was always there. Not necessarily next to him, but _there_ nonetheless.

He started hoping that someone had hexed him in this torture. It was like his mind refused to process any other thought except _Scorpius, Scorpius, Scorpius_.

His blonde-grey hair, his wonderful eyes, his soft voice… the fact that he was the most kind and warm-hearted person he knew…

Focus, Albus.

On top of all, he was his best friend. That changed everything.

A week had passed and Albus was sitting in the common room, talking to a couple of other Slytherin boys. He was never social and concentrating on other people was even more of a pain now, but he was trying and that counted for something.

Their company was pleasant, he had to admit. Or at least more pleasant than the presence of his owl, his only companion for a while.

When the common room's entrance opened and Scorpius walked in, young Potter's heart skipped a beat. Scorpius smiled when he noticed him, but instead of returning the smile, Albus looked away embarrassed.

Scorpius wasn't disappointed; courageously, he got closer and filled in the little company.

To be precise, he sat exactly next to Albus.

It seemed as if he was mimicking on purpose their spots from a week ago. The day Albus left running.

They were so close that Albus could smell the sweet caramel sent that his hair gave away, and it was as if his voice echoed twice as loud than before. Albus could literally feel the boy's presence next to him.

And that is because he wasn't touching him.

Even though he seemed completely normal, smiling as always, he was keeping a distance. Not with precaution, nor like he was uncomfortable. More like as if he was trying not to bother the other boy.

Albus did his best to remain there, at least for a bit, in an attempt to not make himself more suspicious. He focused on his breath and tried to forget the fact that this gorgeous boy was – _no,_ the fact that he was literally showered with sweat, because Scorpius wasn't one of his thoughts, of course not, he had forgotten about him _for good._

Even though no one commented on it, everyone in the company observed that from the moment Scorpius came, Albus had turned mute.

But then a joke was told, Scorpius' laughter was heard, and Albus lost all control on himself.

He shot up from the couch, mumbling something that sounded like "I'll be right back", even though he had no such intention.

This time his friend didn't follow him physically, just with his sad, disappointed look.

That meant _so many things, so many terrible, terrible things _– it meant that Albus didn't have to run, which was good, it was good. He exited the Slytherin common room, and he had the liberty to stop right there as the entrance closing behind him!

He didn't even try to stop his tears. He just made sure to have walked far away so he wouldn't be heard from the inside. He still had _some_ dignity.

He wandered a bit around the dungeons, begging himself to calm down soon. He _was_ getting over Scorpius, he was seeing improvement. The fact that he couldn't stop crying was out of the topic. It must have been the outcome of walking around the dungeons, the most depressing part of the entire castle. Yes, _that's _why he wasn't feeling any better as time went by.

He tried to take his mind away from Scorpius. Even though it wasn't all that late, no one seemed to be out of their common rooms. To find himself some company, the boy got into talking with some portraits. They obviously weren't used to attention, as they started talking nonstop. He found his chance to slip away easily while the portraits were caught up in a conflict on whether he was Harry Potter or not.

A woman yell: "You couldn't have met Harry Potter while you were alive, you imbecile; you were made at fifteen hundred!" and Albus couldn't stop his first hoarse little laugh in a while.

It was eleven o'clock. As they had classed the next morning, most of the kids would have probably gone to bed by now. Talking to other people, even for a mere 'goodnight', made him feel sick, so he decided to wait a bit more, until about midnight.

He ended up wandering around the entire castle. Or at least, a big part of it. Even after all this time, it was necessary for him to bite the inside of his cheek to keep his tears from falling. And it wouldn't work every time.

"Ah, certainly Potter's spawn would go wandering around the school during the night, showing no interest for our curfew or the rules in general."

Albus turned curiously to see who had spoken. Every other portrait was ignoring him now that he was ignoring them, but one of them seemed to have a different opinion.

He didn't even have to read its name to know who it was depicting. Black greasy shoulder-length hair, obsidian grey eyes, crooked nose.

Severus Snape.

"You're up to something, aren't you? That or you just couldn't sleep, so why not break a couple of rules, huh?"

"In Merlin's name!" cried the boy in anger. "You're such a jerk! I can't believe my father…"

Snape looked at him irritated. "Such manners are expected from someone like you. Well go on. Your father what?"

Albus looked at him with the bravery of a Griffindor. "My father named me after you."

The sentiment of surprise couldn't be more obvious on the man's face. "Severus Potter?"

"Albus Severus", he corrected.

If the man was touched, he didn't show it. "That doesn't make you any less uncivilized than all the previous ones. Gryffindor, I suppose?"

The young boy shook his head. "Slytherin".

This time the man's eyes got wide. "A Potter, in our humble House? Oh, such an honor!" he mocked, irony dripping from his voice, even though deep down he was pretty impressed.

Albus bit his tongue to stop himself from saying something bitter. Instead, he took a deep breath and thought about it for a few moments.

"I'm sorry", he said at last.

The man was taken aback. "For what reason?" he snapped.

"I'm sorry I talked like that before. Just… it's a hard time for me".

The man in the portrait looked at him intensely, but decided to put aside his snarky comments for a while and listen to the boy. "Come closer, Potter, there is no reason for you to stand in the center of the corridor".

Albus did as he was told, surprising himself of his own obedience. When he got closer, Severus noticed his puffed, red eyes. "Have you been crying?"

The young boy averted his gaze from the man, a move which didn't offer him any shield from his intense stare. "I told you, it's tough".

If he hadn't seen the boy's eyes, the ex-professor would do a comment such as, 'a Potter having a hard time? I suppose that a teacher disrespected you and gave you something less than Excellent.'

But not now. The kid was crying. Something was obviously wrong. "Do you want to talk about it?"

The boy glared at him. "What do you care? You just met me."

"Potter," he spat, "as heartless as many people thought I was, when I see one of my Slytherins wandering in the corridors and crying on his own, I must offer help".

Albus shot him a glance, thought about it for a second and then sighed. "Oh, screw it, you're just a portrait."

"Language, young man!"

"I could have said that a lot worse!" shot back the boy. Then he sighed again, with the man always observing him closely. "It's about my… friend. My best friend. Scorpius".

Snape's eyes got huge. "Malfoy? A Potter and a Malfoy?"

_Wait till you hear what comes next_, thought Albus. "Yeah, my dad had the same reaction". The man smirked, but didn't add any more comments.

"And what happened? Did you fight?"

Albus shook his head. "No… not yet."

"Then what?" asked Snape with curiosity he didn't expect from himself. That boy was… he couldn't put his finger on it. Weird, he'd say, but it wouldn't be remotely true.

The young snake took a deep breath. "I… I like him". It was the first time he said it out loud. He had to admit it was relieving.

The man in the portrait shifted uncomfortably. "What?" he whispered.

Albus nodded, as if confirming this wasn't some kind of prank. "Yes, and I don't know what to do. I waited for it to go away, but it won't, and I can't take it anymore!" He covered his mouth to stop a sob, but failed. The man seemed stunned and having a hard time processing what he was saying. "He just… means a lot to me and… I don't want to lose him".

The man tried to swallow his surprise. "Have you… have you thought of telling him?"

Albus looked at him wide-eyed. "No way. No. just no. it's the only certain way for us to stop talking for good."

"You don't know that," the Potions Master pointed out. "Even if he doesn't return your feelings, if he's truly your best friend, he will help you get over it and won't leave you on your own."

This idea hadn't even crossed Albus' mind. He processed it for a few moments. "I don't know" he said finally.

"Believe me" continued Snape. "You never know what may happen. I assume," he cleared his throat, "I assume your father has informed you about me and his…" He cleared his throat again.

"Yeah" the boy got him out of his misery. "He has".

"Good" said the man, even though from his expression Albus took it was far from 'good'. "There was no single day from the moment we fought until I… died, that I didn't wish I had just confessed. Perhaps it would have changed nothing… but perhaps everything would be different."

The boy thought about it nodding his head, first slowly and then with more speed. "You're right", he said resolutely.

Ten minutes later he was on his was to his dorm. He would go to bed, and first thing tomorrow morning he would tell his best friend he was in love with him. And he would be prepared for whatever would follow. Things could go as awful as they wanted, but in the end he would ask him to forget everything so they could go back to normal, and that was better than what he was experiencing now.

He never would have guessed that he would find Scorpius awake in the common room, though there he was. Sitting all alone in an armchair, his arms crossed, well after midnight.

The moment he stepped his foot inside, his friend's head snapped up at his direction.

"It's the second time you do that", Scorpius pointed out, putting all of his strength into keeping his voice still. The other one gave him a weird look, but he continued before he was interrupted. "It's the second time that I come near you and you run away. Why?"

Albus was still trying to process what was going on. In theory everything was good, but now he didn't find it all that easy to confess his feelings, especially towards _that_ person.

He couldn't help but feel grateful that the room was dark and the boy was far from him so he couldn't see him well, or else he didn't know what other reaction his body would have. After all, it wouldn't be the first time.

Scorpius saw that his friend was having a hard time answering him and didn't hesitate to press on – but he did it while speaking really, really quickly. "Look, I didn't want to get to this point, but you made me. You're avoiding me _this entire week_, and I could see that something was off but I did not want to push you, so I kept waiting for you to tell me yourself and left you on your own, which was bad, I know, but it's because I was waiting for when you'd be ready to talk about whatever's troubling you, but this has gone too far".

The more he spoke the closer he went to the other boy. With every step Scorpius took, Albus' heart would beat faster. His breaths were sharp and, as the other boy came closer, less and less oxygen got into his lungs.

When Scorpius got near enough, he stopped breathing for a second at the sight of Albus. He seemed extremely tired and his eyes were red and puffy.

"Are you alright? Have you been crying?" he asked with worry. Something was seriously wrong with Albus, now he could see it besides of just feeling it.

Young Potter's palm had started sweating. He couldn't do it, but he had to.

How do you tell your best friend that you were crying because you're in love with him?

Now his entire face was red, not only his eyes. "It's none of your business".

These six words were enough to make Scorpius mad. "No, Albus, no. That's what I'm trying to explain. It is my business, because you, you damned idiot, are my best friend, and I care for you, so much that you can't imagine".

Albus swallowed hard.

His friend was absolutely right.

He would go for it. He had to. He'd tell him. Snape was right and he could see it in front of him. Yes, he was more uncomfortable than he had ever been – which says a lot, considering Albus was born feeling awkward and uncomfortable – but his friend deserved to know why he was giving him the cold shoulder out of nowhere.

"Come on now, Al", said Scorpius softly, encouraging his friend, seeing how he was about to spill. "You'll feel better if you tell me".

Something snapped inside Albus. Now the sadness was gone and anger was overflowing.

"Alright, you wanna know what's going on? I'll show you what's going on!" Ignoring his friend's signals to speak quietly, he grabbed him by the wrist and turned him towards him.

Throwing himself on Scorpius, he kissed him violently.

It only lasted a few seconds, even though Albus wished it would last forever. Those seconds was all it took for all of his courage, and most of his anger, to fade away.

He pulled away.

His heart was beating so loudly he could feel it in his ears. The panic he was feeling the previous days seemed like nothing compared to now.

_Maybe he should run off again…_

No. No, he shouldn't. It was about time became a man and faced his friend.

His possibly _ex_-friend.

Embarrassed kept him from looking at Scorpius. It felt like he would never be confident enough to look into his beautiful eyes again.

If he had dared once glance, though, he would see that Scorpius' face was maybe even more red than his own.

And that he was smiling.

When Albus heard him laugh, as wonderful as it may have sounded, it was a shock. And once the wave of surprise was gone, anger came back full-force.

"Does it seem funny to you?" he attacked as if he was about to strangle him. Not even his aggressive tone was enough to cut off Scorpius' laughter.

"You have no idea" answered the young Malfoy.

Albus wasn't in a state to notice it, but Scorpius laugh wasn't a mean one. It was calm, soft and perhaps… relieved.

"Oh, so my feelings are ridiculous to you!"

"No, just…" Scorpius found it impossible to stop laughing.

"Just what?" pressed on the other one, who was getting angrier by the moment.

"It's just… oh, fuck words!"

Without giving Albus a second to think about it, Scorpius closed the gap between them and kissed him softly, with gentleness had nothing in common with the violence in the previous kiss.

They both thought that it ended too fast.

When they separated, Albus was out of words. Scorpius, on the other hand, had refilled his supplies of confidence and had a lot to say.

"See? That's why you should _never_ be embarrassed when it comes to me!"

"How could I know that?" whispered the other one, still in shock.

Scorpius shrugged. "I didn't know either, but it became pretty obvious pretty fast. When you stopped talking to me, I was a mess. The world was falling apart for me. The mornings I could barely get out of bed. When I realized you were _actually_ avoiding me, I almost collapsed! I thought I was losing you, and, well… I don't want that to happen, _ever_. I want to keep you forever as… maybe as something more than a friend."

Now Albus smiled – how could he _not _smile at such words? That warm feeling of comfort he always got with being with Scorpius came back, and before he knew it, he was opening up.

"I found out about a week ago," he explained. "I, on the other hand, thought that I didn't want to lose you, even if that meant that we would stay friends. That's why I didn't tell you. Yes, I was avoiding you, and that was bad, but I thought that if waited enough I would get over it and we would go back to being friends and friends are much better than nothing-at-alls if you think about it, and… I was about to lose you in a different way".

Finally, relief. Being able to say everything to Scorpius was a feeling he never wanted to take a break from again.

"Oh, Al," murmured Scorpius and gave him a gentle kiss. "It must have been tough".

Albus nodded, his smile now small and tired. "You can't imagine what I've been through these days. Never let me go through that again."

His friend smiled wide at him and kissed him even softer, if that was possible.

"Never," he promised. "What do you say, shall we go to bed? You look like you'll fall asleep any moment now. We can continue in the morning".

Albus was about to answer that he wasn't going anywhere. That all he wanted was them to stay exactly how they were, just kissing softly for hours, for days, for years, for ever. He was scared that if he made a single move, this dreamlike world would somehow break and he would find himself curled up crying in the bathroom, just like he was doing every single day all week.

But in the end, the only answer he gave Scorpius was a small, drained nod.

They got to their dorm, where everyone else was – or at least seemed to be – asleep, with their soft breaths – and their loud snores, for one case – echoing.

Albus got ready to curl up in his bed, but Scorpius had a better idea.

"Hey" he whispered. "Wanna come over?"

The other looked at him with surprise, but he wasn't mad enough to protest. They both climbed on the blonde boy's bed, and closed the curtains so they wouldn't be found in the morning like that out of nowhere. This new sort of relationship was probably something they'd have to announce carefully, but right now that was the last thing they cared about.

Once tucked in, Albus instinctively wrapped his arms around the other boy. Scorpius didn't seem to be annoyed, the opposite actually. He nested in young Potter's arms and breathed in his sent.

"So we're good?"

"We couldn't be any other way".

The boys fell asleep in each other's arms. None of them had slept so peacefully in years.

...

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